The Helen Garlick Interview: No Place to Lie

Pitfalls which instantly spring to mind, deterring me from writing my own book, include; an overwhelming tidal wave of self-doubt, who would want to read what I have to say, is this a little self-indulgent and how do I pick myself up if I get rejected? The list goes on and on and this is why I genuinely have a dusty manuscript lying under my bed.

We are fortunate to live in a hugely creative area with artisans and authors a plenty. One of which is Helen Garlick, whose memoir No Place To Live; Secrets Unlocked A Promise Kept has already burst onto the literary scene to five star acclaim both in the UK and more recently in the US.

Before I speak to Helen, I just wanted to give you a little bit of background on our local author, she was born in Yorkshire, but now lives in Fernhurst with her husband, Tim and her beloved Spaniels; Pippin and Ziggy Stardust. She had a very successful career as lawyer and mediator.

Helen’s debut memoir focuses on two pivotal life-changing events. The first being the death of her 20-year-old brother in a remote mansion. This catalyst triggers a quest to unravel deep-seated truths shrouded in secrets and silence. The other event involves a secret her mother took to her grave...but you will have to read the book to find out what this is!

Having read this beautifully written, compelling book I wanted to ask Helen, why she wrote it and why now?

In your memoir you said your mother put you off writing because it “didn’t pay well” and you pursued a career as a solicitor, so did you always want to be a writer?

The family story goes that when I was three my mum asked me what I wanted to do and I said I wanted to be a writer. It was always my dream, but I was directed pretty firmly instead to be a solicitor by my mother. That was probably good advice - qualifying in law always gives you something to come back to as a profession, after time out for babies. But I'm absolutely at my happiest when writing. I’ve created a writing room which looks out towards the South Downs. I almost feel I need to pinch myself - but the truth is I wake up in paradise nowadays.

You waited 40 years to write your memoir, why did you feel this was the right time to write?

I made a promise to myself to write the true story behind my younger brother David’s death back in 1981 but I couldn’t write that story whilst my parents were alive - it would have been too challenging, especially for my Dad. My father died in 2014, and my mother in 2017 - and then she left a secret which she took to her grave, so I decided I just had to write about that too.

Were you worried about revealing personal information about your family such as suicide and other deeply embedded secrets?

This is a perennial issue for memoirists - so the short answer is yes. However, that is balanced by the huge amount of good that I’m already finding the book is achieving. I've had dozens and dozens of wonderful messages from people telling me how much reading it has helped them in different ways - for example a close boyhood friend of my brother’s who still 40 years later had been struggling with the fact that David died and its effect on him to someone I didn’t know at all who told me the book had helped give her courage when she told her children she was gay.

Was writing about your brother cathartic and do you feel suicide is still a taboo?

I found it painful and therapeutic and releasing and invigorating and many other things in between all of that. Writing the book and researching the court papers gave me greater clarity over what had really happened with my brother David and helped me make sense of what had happened. Suicide is absolutely still a taboo subject - it is killing annually about as many people as COVID-19 did last year but there is of course no vaccine for it. We need to face up to the difficult reality that a tragically high number of people are taking their own lives, figure out why and help reduce those numbers right down.

Is there anything you put in your book, which you later took out?

I wrote many chapters about the last years of my mum, including her psychotic episodes, caring for her and her eventually going into a care home and dying only eight days later. That was cathartic for me but did not really make the book a page turner - which is what I wanted it to be. So I was ruthless and cut nearly all of that out. I wanted the book to be respectful of my family - I’ve had feedback that it is from many people, including the wonderful Libby Purves, so I hope that I’ve met that aim. I also wrote a lot more about the animals of my childhood but my husband (Tim Rice, formerly of The Times) suggested I might take that out, and I did as I was aiming for the book to be about 75k words.

How did you recall your childhood memories in such vivid detail, did you keep a diary?

I did keep diaries but most of them I’ve sadly thrown away. Only one or two remain. Maybe that’s not such a bad thing. I was contacted by someone in Cornwall after he’d read the book and I think that one of my early diaries mostly just had his name scrawled in it: I had such a crush on him! There are scenes in the book from my childhood that I remember still very clearly and quite intensely. As a little girl I was shy and liked to hide under a willow tree and read and write with my golden retriever as company. I probably went over and over those scenes in my head then and they then stayed in my imagination. I’ve always had a very powerful imagination and vivid dreams which really helped me when I was writing the book.

Once you decide to write a book, where do you start?

I would really like to say that I was logical and structured but it’s not like that. I mostly just wrote, pretty much every day, aiming for 2,000 words at first (but now I’m happy with 1,000-1,500 - it feels more achievable and less of an anxiety-making burden). I tend to write like circling around a volcanic crater - going round and round and then getting brave and going into the hot core. Then coming out again. I produced a lot of material and struggled for quite a while about whether this should be two books or one, and I decided one rich, textured book would be the best format. I started the book with what is now chapter one but then that felt like too abrupt a start, so I wrote a foreword first.

I had several endings before I decided on this one. Once I had the right ending, funnily enough the rest of the structure then flowed into place. By the way, I am one of those weird people who likes to read endings of books first. There. I’ve confessed it now.

How, where and when do you write?

I write on a laptop mostly but also use mind mapping by hand and jot down notes. I write mostly in the morning on a sofa in the living room and sometimes in my writing room - I use the latter more for editing. After I really got into writing the book, actually it felt like my soul was writing it - all I had to do was turn up and it flowed out from me. The book (or my soul, or something!) would wake me up in the middle of the night and tell me that another bit needed to go into a particular chapter. This book was really bursting out of me. I tend to give myself one day a week off.

Do you ever get writer’s block and if so, how do you overcome this?

Not exactly. I would get what I call writer’s avoidance when I decided other things were more important. I always have to come back to the writing. Unless I have written in a day I feel unfulfilled. Honestly the answer for me and for many other writers I believe is consistency: just keep turning up. There were days, and there still are sometimes, when all I would be writing is rubbish - like real rubbish (‘you’re not a good writer, who do you think you are’ sort of nonsense) but I found if I kept going that I would get into some interesting territory. It’s almost like the ego defending something where you feel vulnerable - but if you have the courage to keep going, you can find real gold.

Did you work during lockdown and was this a help or hindrance?

Lockdown was frankly magical for my writing. I ran out of excuses. I finished this book during the first lockdown.

Did you ask a trusted friend to check your manuscript, is it hard to take criticism?

Does any adult find it easy to take criticism? Please introduce me to that person so that I can chat to them about how they do it?! Seriously though, yes, I have had help from so many others. Tim, who was an editor (lucky me) has seen several drafts of the book and we’ve discussed it a lot. I had help from a wonderful writing coach, Gabriela Blandy for a year and I also joined a CBC online memoir writing group where I had the most wonderful feedback from other creative writers. My son’s girlfriend is also a writer and editor, Megan James, and she looked through it and gave me great feedback so that I had enough confidence to submit it to my publisher. I was finding it hard to identify who I was writing this book for. It is a lot easier once you have an ideal reader in mind. I chose an old school friend whom I had lost touch with and then met up with again, after she had had cancer. She was terrifically supportive and also encouraged me to write a braver, truer ending.

You have had books published before, so why did you decide to self-publish?

I've been published by Penguin and Simon & Schuster before and also written academic books but this project was so different. I put my foot into the water of traditional publishing and trying to find an agent and did not love the rejection and negativity I came across. Rather than have more of that, I decided to empower myself and take agency over this project and found Whitefox Publishing who aim to publish for thought leaders for example. Thinking of myself as a thought leader frankly gave me more confidence in itself.

What advice would you give to aspiring writers?

• Write consistently, ideally every day. Even if it’s just for twenty minutes, even ten.

• Read widely. You gain so much from excellent books but also from ‘bad’ books too - you can see their faults (in your eyes, we’re each different).

• Be around other writers and readers - the ones who give you energy not the ones who drain it away from you.

• Look after yourself really well - talk, walk, do yoga, eat well, meditate, whatever you need to do - the higher your energy, the better you will be able to write.

• Hand write three pages each day, preferably first thing in the morning. About whatever you want to write. 



Explain what it is like to hold your published book.

Magic. Pure gold.

After people have read your book, what lasting memory or message would you like them to take away with them?

Whatever they need to hear from the book which will help and uplift them in their own lives and give them courage. It is such a multi-faceted book and there is something for pretty much everyone in it.

What's next?

I’m writing another book called the Golden Litter about the litter of golden cocker spaniel puppies we bred last year. It’s also about other themes - what we treasure and what we throw away, the power of connection with other humans and dogs and indeed with the planet. I’m also hoping to run some communication courses next year and in 2023 will be walking with Tim and our two spaniels Pippin and her son Ziggy Stardust from Lands End to John O’Groats to fundraise for suicide prevention and wellbeing charities.

Helen has very kindly agreed to do a Q and A on Zoom on 6th May at 8pm, open to all. Find more information on Facebook. You can purchase No Place to Lie: Secrets Unlocked, a Promise Kept on Amazon, or visit Helen's Youtube Channel for more information.